paris hilton’s day at the office

recipient:

American Express/P.O. Box 31511/Salt Lake City, UT 84131-9934

sent:

fake Hilton Hotel Honors American Express card my father received in the mail.

along with an application for the card with the information and address

Paris Hilton/P.O. Box 9003/Addison, TX 75001-9003

reasoning:

get it? get it? i sent the american express company’s hilton hotel honors division an application from paris hilton, herself. ok, well paris hilton working from the customer service desk of her heir empire. when the sietch blog suggested using the no postage required envelopes to send stuff back to the spamming corporations, one reader suggested that this can be done with catalogs as well. you call the catalog company to change your address, and you can either reroute it to another catalog company, or even more cleverly back to the company you are calling – either due to outsourcing or cluelessness on the part of the customer service representative.

so here, i thought it’d be somewhat amusing to have it seem like paris hilton went to her dad’s work one day (like she would ever be caught dead behind a computer, with a headset in her ears…), the customer service division that works with american express, the one situated in Addision, TX and decided as a practical joke to apply for one of their credit cards. not that she would need more – what do you think paris hilton’s credit limit is??!? so paris hilton signs up for an american express “hilton hhonors” card and sends it in, but doesn’t want the person on the other end to catch on that it’s her, and then think that they have her address, and consequently sell it to paparazzi or save it to stalk her, themselves, so she uses the exact same address of the customer service PO box that she is working/writing from. the application goes out in the mail, travels all over the united states, only to land back in the place where it was sent from. a guy who graduated from University of Chicago but has been unsuccessfully in keeping a steady job, and has taken up the night shift with American Express to supplement his ever-increasing need for crack, overlooks that the application says “Paris Hilton” and the address is the very same box he took the envelope out of in the first place. paris hilton gets a credit card issued to her, but its sent to the place that issued it, they don’t realize their mistake until they get it in the mail but have supplied paris with the card info via email, and by then they have given her a 20,000 credit limit, and it’s already been sent on buying Benji Madden another tattoo, and her dog “tinkerbell”(?) another diamond necklace.

that’s how it will go down.

the USPS on green bandwagon?

the no postage required envelopes have been a little hard to come by these days, i think it might be b/c i’m away at school, and all the credit card offers, and nonprofit donation envelopes are being sent to my home in PA. but that will all change soon as i graduate, reluctantly move back home for (one week at the most!), change all of my addresses and my childhood identity and move to DC. once that happens, i’m sure i’ll be swimming in free envelopes and addresses.

but i found this on the internets: the USPS (my beloved) is kickstarting a new recycling program where people can pick up envelopes at their local post office and send in ink cartridges, PDAs, cellphones, digital cameras, or iPods to be recycled. all the cartridges or small electronics are processed by Clover Technologies Group where it is either refurbished or scrapped for parts. The group has a “zero waste to landfill” policy, so there’s a concerted effort to recycle everything.

Press Release Here

“As one of the nation’s leading corporate citizens, the Postal Service is committed to environmental stewardship,” said Anita Bizzotto, chief marketing officer and executive vice president for the Postal Service. “This program is one more way the Postal Service is empowering consumers to go green.”

The Postal Service recycles 1 million tons of paper, plastic and other materials annually. Last year, USPS generated more than $7.5 million in savings through recycling and waste prevention programs. The nation’s environmental watchdog, the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) has awarded the Postal Service eight WasteWise Partner of the Year awards, the agency’s top honor

it’s nice to hear that even though the very business and industry of the USPS is paper goods -one of the most recycled, but also most wasted – they are working towards being as environmentally friendly and sustainable as can be. certainly with computers, email, the internet, etc. mailing through the postal service is becoming a less and less frequently used service, they are undoubtedly losing money. things look to be on an imminent downward decline for the USPS, i mourn the day they may have to go out business. so they could have chosen to not put in the funds or effort to recycle and use resources effectively, but this press release makes me appreciate that while they are losing because of the capitalist globalization model, they are not necessarily following the same business model of cutting costs, and maximizing profits. they are keeping customer interests, as well as the larger environmental sustainability in mind, perhaps even at the expense of costs and profits.

give me employment

recipient:

American Federation of State, County and Municipal Employees, AFL-CIO/Alternative Union Break/1625 L Street, N.W./Washington, DC 20036-5687

sent:

a check next to I’m interested in learning more about helping workers build power… and strategic research positions

also my name, college, graduation date, languages, and email address. see my address in previous post about BU summer program.

reasoning:

sorry i’m going through an all about me, and how nopostagerequired needs to be employed, or studying, or traveling so as not to spend the summer after college graduation sitting on her parents’ couch watching Maury reruns. While i had a most worst time doing Union Summer for the AFL-CIO last summer in NH, I purposely did not put a check next to Careers in Union Organizing because i found out just how much i am not a union organizer. but it’s getting to the point where i am also desperate to find a job that i am not eliminating labor organizing work, including for the AFL-CIO, or one of its conglomerates, out as a possibility. Le Sigh.

i’m a bit suspicious, as their Union Break website description looks fairly similar to the AFL’s Union Summer one, where no one in the program had a decent experience. most of us went in thinking we’d be organizing unions, doing things like this.

but all of the kids who were sent to NH became just rookie canvassers for an AFL side project called Working America. Where we weren’t organizing unions, just knocking on the door of everyone who lived in NH to see if we could drum up support for abstract ideals like ‘access to healthcare’, ‘holding politicians accountable’, and ‘ensuring there’s enough funding and infrastructure to keep our schools running’. all the effort was more to just get people’s information, so we could target them in the future, especially around election time, and ensure that they would be voting for progressive/AFL-CIO endorsed/Democratic candidates. i can never seem to rant enough about my summer in NH, and the AFL-CIO, and my disapproval of the canvassing model for the greater movement, whether it be labor, immigration, politics, or animal rights.

i know i’m just going to be a college graduate so i can’t expect the most amazing jobs and opportunities to fall into my lap, but i would also like to not have my first official job be one that i absolutely hate but still do because i understand that “i have to work up the ranks and do all the dirty, grunge work first”. yeah, yeah, yeah, i’ll complain a bit more about how i don’t just want another crap job, and it’s hard looking for jobs, and why won’t anyone give me a job. and why do i have to do 3 research papers simultaneously to this job search? and why can’t they just give me a diploma, i’ve pulled enough all-nighters already to warrant a degree from this school. ok. i’m done.

i need something to do after smith…….

recipient:

Summer Term/Boston University/PO Box 15716/Boston, MA 02215-9632

sent:

my address:

1 Chapin Way #6396/Northampton, MA 01063-6301/United State

-i realize that i’m putting my address onto my blog, onto the world wide web. but it’s a PO Box, which hopefully means…. open invitation to anyone reading this, who loves paper goods, and mail as much as me to send me something!

i’m interested in studying fine arts, creative writing, landscape/urban studies, population studies, architecture, philosophy, geology, astrology, and literature. basically all the things i never fully got a chance to do while i was at Smith

reasoning:

though graduating in may after 17 years of schooling (kindergarten included) makes me never ever want to go to school again, i still have not secured any employment, travel itineraries, or further education plans. one reason i don’t ever want to go to school again is i fail at writing papers, and consistently reading, and being able to constructively and critically examine anything i do, see, read, or hear. which simplifies into: i fail at school. i’m surprised i’ve gotten this far. so as of right now… no school for awhile.

but i’m looking to receive a catalog about BU’s summer term program, where i could conceivably pay more money to get more schooling, which would inevitably involve more writing papers, and more reading. most likely not going to go to boston and do their summer term, but perhaps i’ll be motivated to look more into schooling and employment opportunities when i have a catalog of potential things i could be doing after may 18th, because i believe on this proper tract of job and future life plans applications process, i am failing. much like or in the way this blog explains it: FAIL.

perhaps here i am not so much sticking it to the large business conglomerates that waste paper, stuffing our mailboxes with catalogs, or credit card offers that we don’t need. i will point out that i am using Boston University’s free postage to my benefit… in hopes that i will one day either go back to school, or finally get a job. so a reversal of the “sticking it to the man” effort, wherein i’m the “woman” who needs to be doing something after graduation.

the basic purpose of this blog… just better articulated

End Junk Mail Forever

written by The Naib on July 24, 2007

Most people don’t think about it but all that junk mail that gets sent to you has to go someplace. Most of us throw it away, some of us recycle it, but either way we are paying to dispose of it. Some communities pay to have their trash taken away, others use a tax system, and still others require that you pay for the right to use a dump. Even if you recycle the junk mail, you are still paying. Recycling in most communities is paid for the same way trash collection is.

Besides all the money it costs you, companies that make junk mail are wasting paper, wasting ink, wasting power to create the junk mail, wasting gas to send the mail to you, and wasting your time when you have to sort it out of the mail. So how can we make this madness stop? How can we stop junk mail?

You have just forwarded all the cost of disposal onto the junk mailer. They will have to pay someone (or run some machine) to open your mail, and then pay to dispose of the confetti that falls out. They also have to pay the postage on this garbage. Not only is this a fun game, the more junk mail you get the fatter you can stuff the little return envelopes. I have stuffed entire catalogs into credit card return envelopes. Use some tape to keep it shut, the fatter the envelope the more the post office will charge the junk mailer.

There is also no reason you cant send the junk mail that didn’t come with a return envelope back to the junk mailer that did send you one. In this way you can send the Pottery Barn catalog back to Visa, and the coupon book back to MasterCard. If each and every one of us moves the cost of junk mail back to the junk mailers we can impose millions of dollars in “fines” on them each year. Imagine how much it is going to cost them to dispose of millions of pounds of scrap paper each year.

On October 20, 2007 kanling wrote:

You also want to call the catalogs and change your address. Change the address to that of other catalog companies. (Heck, some of the customer service people are so poorly trained, that you can often change your address to that of the same catalog company you are calling!)

The Sietch comes from one of Frank Herbert’s Dune books, meaning “a place of sanctuary in times of danger”, it’s an online community that enlightens and educates about world problems such as climate change, sustainability, and recycling. most of the posts are about what we, as ordinary people, can do or change to make a bigger, overall impact upon the well-being of our earth.

pro-choice love?

recipient:

Lucky Magazine/ PO Box 37650/Boone, IA 50037-2650

sent:

“I Love Pro-Choice Boys” and “I Love Pro-Choice Girls” stickers from NARAL Pro-Choice America, a leading advocacy group for privacy and a woman’s right to choose, who conduct their work by helping to elect pro-choice candidates, organizing local communities, lobbying Congress, and conducting research & analysis on the federal, but also state and local levels as well.

reasoning:

a magazine like Lucky with its focus upon shopping, clothes, and other goods, and its primary target being women would most likely be pro-choice or female reproductive freedom-friendly, so these stickers should seemingly be right in line. perhaps they’ll even look up the website, and the merchandise, and feature it in the back pages of ads as something you can buy online.

it’s interesting to note that these “I love pro-choice boys” and “i love pro-choice girls” sticker seem cute, laughable, and irreverent at first glance, and something most progressive, liberal-minded folk would gladly wear or display. but as my housemate, charactersketch, pointed out, would it be ok for a boy to wear an “I love pro-choice girls” sticker, with perhaps an implication that he could do whatever he wanted with them, and sleep around, and they may or may not exercise their choice in possibly aborting the baby that may result from one of their late-night trysts? and if i a girl were to wear an “i love pro-choice boys” sticker, to mean that she is attracted to like-minded boys who wouldn’t mind if she chose to get an abortion. this speaks only of heterosexual relationships, what about homosexual, queer, or uncategorized acts of love, what does one person wearing this possibly signify to the other?

it may seem that we’re both reading too much into the words and first glance meaning of the sticker, but these sayings on stickers, pins, and t-shirts are becoming ever-popular. people are adopting them to say the things they feel but do not want to necessarily constantly verbally express. so while the purpose behind “i love pro-choice boys” and “i love pro-choice girls” may be a seemingly superficial attempt to tell people one’s own political views, and to hopefully attract looks or chuckles from seemingly like-minded people, there’s a power behind words, languages, and clothing as a form of expression. i’d be cautious because the implications of this saying reach far deeper into the pro-choice/pro-life debate to being whether or not the act of an abortion is allowed, acceptable as a form of birth control, or excusable, and also the need to commodify every movement, feeling, and expression in our consumerist culture today.

first attempt

recipient:

Creative Home Arts Club/New Member Processing Center/P.O. Box 3449/Hopkins, MN 55343-4711

sent:

description of I.D. Tags exhibition at Smith College Museum of Art

”ID Tags is an ongoing series of supplemental labels for select works on view at the Smith College Museum of Art. The project aims to consider the artworks in terms of aspects of culture that forms one’s identity, such as race, gender, sexuality, and economic status. The project brought a group of Smith faculty members, museum staff, and students together to select, discuss, and write about artworks in the collection taking race as a thematic focal point. In counterpoint to the anonymous authority of the traditional museum label, ID Tags are transparently rooted in the personal knowledge and experience of the writers who are identified in the labels as well. it is our hope that such reflections will give voice to members of the museum’s community and will enhance viewers’ experience through their consideration of how art can relate to our current understanding of our cultures and ourselves.”

Tattered and Torn, 1886, Alfred Kappes

works of art include:

• Pretty Penny, 1939, Edward Hopper, Tagwriter: Nicole Roylance, Smith College Museum of Art.
• Freedom: A Fable by Kara Elizabeth Walker, 1997, Kara Elizabeth Walker, Tagwriter: Elizabeth Willis Smith ‘08.
• Andrew Faneuil Phillips (1729-1775), 1755, Joseph Blackburn, Tagwriter: Sophia LaCava-Bohanan Smith ‘08.
• Mrs. John Erving (Abigail Phillips, 1702-1759), c. 1733, John Smibert, Tagwriter: Sophia LaCava-Bohanan Smith ‘08.
• The Honourable John Erving (1693-1786), c. 1772, John Singleton Copley, Tagwriter: Sophia LaCava-Bohanan Smith ‘08.
• Dr. William Samuel Johnson, 1761, Thomas McIlworth, Tagwriter: Sophia LaCava-Bohanan Smith ‘08.
• Tattered and Torn, 1886, Alfred Kappes, Tagwriter: Daphne LaMothe, Smith Afro-American Studies.
• Tattered and Torn, 1886, Alfred Kappes, Tagwriter: Floyd Cheung, Smith English and American Studies.
• The May Queen, 1875, Daniel Chester French, Tagwriter: Malaika Brooks-Smith-Lowe Smith ‘08.
• Recolte des Oranges a Capri, 1868, Edouard Alexandre Sain, Tagwriter: Daphne LaMothe, Smith Afro-American Studies.
• Bust of a Chinese Man (Le Chinois), 1872-1874, Jean Baptiste Carpeaux, Tagwriter: Ann Musser, Smith College Museum of Art.

reasoning:

People in Minnesota should know about what’s going on in the Smith College Museum of Art, plus bringing accountability and the recognition of bias to a seemingly neutral piece of writing is a reminder that however factual, there’s always a partiality to written work. A hard lesson that I learned the winter of my first year in college, when social critic and activist Keith Snow illustrated the ties The New York Times had with other sketchier conglomerates like Exxon, and Victoria’s Secret.

start

so you know these things you always get in the mail?

they come with credit card offers, mail catalog orders, and soliciting non-profit organizations. consider the envelopes junk mail, spam, or postal refuse, my plan with this blog is to make good use of them. i won’t be applying for credit cards or buying kitschy wind chimes or sending checks, but sending papered goods love in place. over the course of my 2 decades on earth, i’ve seen the rate for a postage stamp rise almost exponentially- the United States Postal System has raised its price practically 3 times in the past 2 years. i don’t contend to be an old soul, but yet i find myself saying, “i remember a time when stamps were 29 cents and gas was 99 cents”.

people claim to love getting mail, but yet not many actually send substantial letters to each other anymore. i love sending letters, postcards, and packages as much as i can afford to do so, sometimes it doesn’t even matter who the recipient is. here, with the postage already paid by the corporation/organization, i intend to make more use of the USPS, collecting these envelopes and sending back paper trinkets of whatever i feel like. this is a roundabout way of somewhat reusing and recycling the paper that is already out there. i figure, the postal service system will be able to derive a bit more business, and plus there has to be someone on the other side of these mailings who has to open all the envelopes. perhaps a recipe or a poem will brighten their day, it seems to be a win-win from all sides… even the trees.